Grand Prix Rejects

If it wasn't for the fact that Rosberg is, in theory at least, the one person that can keep Mrs. Bieber from winning another championship, I would have been cheering for a collision to remove both cars from the race. The styles of these two drivers are much better suited to Supercross than F1.

I am delighted that I finally have a fellow American to cheer for. He could not have picked a more difficult venue for a debut, though. A 2-hour race with it being almost impossible to breathe isn't exactly easing into the battle. Rossi seems like a pretty good guy too, which is more than can be sai...

It's gotta be the Chinese GP marshals. Their performance was so rejectful, it has affected races halfway around the world.

For most of my life I have been a huge Miami Dolphins fan and an even bigger F1 fan. Stephen Ross has greatly diminished my enthusiasm for one of these bastions of former glory, and now he's setting out to ruin the other one too. Not good times...

I nominate Piquet as well. If Hamilton is such a Senna fan, he should take a cue from the master and sleep with Nelson's wife to prove a point.

Without question, the Reject of the Race is the World Feed, which gave us 10-frame-per-second picture quality and mismatched, muffled audio. They actually broadcast most of FP2 from the helicopter, when they realized they had a problem, but went back to the terrible ground equipment for qualifying a...

In Mid-June, Montreal doesn't get dark until 22:00 local time. The race started at 13:00. However, there is another storm on the way. There's a window of an hour or two, beginning about now.

It's a credit to the Montreal circuit that this seems to be the one Grand Prix where rain doesn't improve the show.

Webber has a right to be mad at Hamilton. Button doesn't. If you're on a straight, drive straight. Schumacher drove Hamilton off the road at the hairpin and Hamilton had to take to the grass. Button drove Hamilton off the road and there was no grass, just a wall, so they collided.

Driver of the year: Vettel, even though he made some mistakes. I can't really tell how good Kubica was, given who we had to compare him to. Team of the year: Williams did the most with the least and got stronger as the year went on. Reject of the year: Schumacher was a huge disappointment. He was ri...

Easiest ROTR of the season: Ferrari. By the way, Senna never would have taken a win like this. He would have either passed Massa or wrecked him. I am practically choking on the crap spewed by Ferrari about Valencia being a manipulated race. Now we'll see if Jean Todt has the stones to correct this.

Bronze Medal: Sauber front wings. Whether it's a design problem or an issue with Kamui's unique lines through some of the corners, the car appears to be unsafe. I just hope they're not taking unnecessary risks to try to get a company logo on the sidepods. Silver Medal: Lewis Hamilton's attitude. Lik...

I vote Lotus for getting both cars classified and for being much closer to the pace than anyone could have expected. I realize the Bahrain circuit is now something like 25 miles long with the new loop, but getting a car to finish the race only 2 laps down was pretty good.

In the spirit of the greedy, evil troll, here are my medals for reject of the race. Bronze medal: Mark Webber. Sorry guys, but he finished dead last in the Tier I classification. Maybe something was wrong with the car right from the start, but Vettel owned him all weekend. Silver medal: The expanded...

If Toyota is not renewing Glock, I would assume they're not fielding a team at all next season. Maybe Qadbak-Sauber can take their spot on the grid and hire Timo to drive.

I'll cast my vote for the stewards. The Webber penalty was a load of Red Bull. I guess he was found guilty of not driving a Ferrari. As for the Rosberg penalty, what ever happened to the punishment fitting the crime? He gained no advantage, and thanks to the safety car period and the field bunching ...

Continuing the idea of themed racing teams: Team Name: NASCAR (National Automotive Sports Collaboration of American Rejects) Engine Manufacturer: Chev-re-lay Team Principal: AJ Foyt Head Designer: AJ Foyt (AJ don't need no designers. He don't need no computers. And he don't need no foreigners tellin...

I guess I didn't do enough homework on this one! My intent was to go to former incarnations of teams only if the current team didn't have two drivers who were reject-worthy enough. I apologize to Rosset for trying so hard to forget his Tyrrell days, I must have actually convinced myself that the who...

I accept the challenge. Actual deivers from actual teams on the 2009 grid: McLaren 1: Michael Andretti (Podium at Monza be damned) 2: Nigel Mansell (95 edition) Ferrari 3: Luca Badoer 4: Ivan Capelli BMW 5 and 6: The abomination that is their 2009 challenger Renault 7: JJ Lehto (circa 1994) 8: Nelso...

I nominate Eric Van de Poele for his performance in the 1991 San Marino GP (at least I think that was the race; I am too lazy to fact-check). He came within a couple of corners from scoring a couple of points for what was the geometrric nightmare of the Lambo factory effort. Bouns points for not bei...

If only the abbreviations were around long ago. We could have had

Vittorio Brambilla (BRA)
Franck Lagorce (LAG)
Emerson and Christian Fittapaldi (FIT)
Alain Prost (PRO)
James Hunt (*UNT)
Giovanna Amati (DIRTY PIRATE WHORE)

The French Grand Prix Should be held in Montreal. That would then free up a Canadian GP at Ste. Jovite or Mosport. Honestly, the only track in France capable of staging an entertaining Grand Prix is too close to Monaco, and the evil,greedy troll would never let that happen.

I know it would never happen, but how cool would it be if Valentino Rossi drove the Ferrari at Monza one week after riding his Yamaha at Misano?

The finest racing circuit in the United States is Elkhart Lake. It is fast, picturesque, has elevation changes, and has three excellent overtaking opportunities, even for today's double-diffuser aerodynamic mess. The kink after the Carousel is one of the best bends anywhere. Unfortunately, they woul...

It has to be Badoer. Crashing in qualifying, starting last, and finishing last in a race that was won by his teammate is reject-worthy, no matter how old he is or how long it's been since he last raced. Ferrari would have been better off putting Mika Salo in the car.

There was one season where they had Montoya (MOY), Monteiro (MON), and Montagny (beats me).

The most absurd (and within one lap, ironic) one ever was the Spyker of Markus Winklehock (WIN) at a wet Nurburgring.

My ideal 18-race calendar would be insanely dangerous, economically disastrous, and downright impossible, as some of the tracks I would want on the schedule no longer exist. The list that follows is actually feasible, as I only listed current circuits. The travel flow is sensible too 1) Brazil - Int...