Grand Prix Rejects

As finally everyone had left, we decided to just have a nice evening in this place. We went to the Diaz Beach, it would probably be the last time we'd get to relax this much. We also went to look at the New Cape Point Lighthouse, an amazing view, not going to lie. We then walked to the Erica Overnight hut, which was dissapointly a self-catering accomodation. But we could walk at least. So we started driving. Georgeous sights with the famous Tafelberg close to use. We wanted to get a bit closer so we took an alternate road. Traffic was fine as we started a bit late. We turned right in Cape town. Then we crossed a bunch of mountains. We were really vibing. It was only very light rain today so nothing to worry about. We probably won't lose much time. We had to take a decision around the Three sisters crossing point, we decided to go north as we'd have a feeling a lot would go east. We kept driving trough the Savannah and Steppe and reached Strydenburg. As the time was ticking, we had to decide if we wanted to rest here, or risk getting penalty time. Of course we'd drive by the same rules as our competitors, it wouldn't be fair otherwise. We were hoping to reach Hopetown, no pun intended, well i guess it isn't really a pun, but you know what i mean. The clock was now really ticking and we approached the limit, thankfully we found a place to rest at Gannahoek Selfsorg, oh for fox sake, it's another self-catering... Well thank heavens we stopped in Strydenburg to get a quick sandwich.


https://www.google.com/maps/place/Stryd ... &entry=ttu

Nigel Mansell wrote:

"I've been travelling up and down the country."



"Across continental and cultural divides."



"And in spite of my thousands of kilometres on the race track, nothing has challenged me quite like this."

Nigel Mansell and Michael Palin star in

NIGEL MANSELL'S TRIP FROM THE CAPE OF GOOD HOPE TO THE NORWEGIAN TOILET FACILITIES WITH FAMOUS COMEDIAN AND TRAVEL WRITER MICHAEL PALIN PLUS THEIR DOCUMENTARY CREW IN THEIR SEARCH OF WHAT MAKES BRITAIN GREAT


MMXXIV

Nigel Mansell, Day 1, pre-race wrote:On our first day, Michael and I took a trip through the heart of the inner city of Cape Town, trying to understand from our own upbringings how children of the world today can grow and live content, worthwhile, and ultimately fruitful lives. I'm so happy to be doing this today with my good friend Michael Palin. I know that, whatever happens on this trip, Michael's got my back, and I know that I've got his. I think, more than anything else in this race, it's going to be good old-fashioned comradeship and brotherhood that get Michael and I to the finish line the fastest and the most fruitfully. When I know that Michael has my back, and that I have his, and that we support each other as we go through this trip, no matter what happens - and trust me, I expect a lot of exciting things to happen - then I know that Michael and I will get each other through the difficult days. And also through the happy days, let's not forget those. We expect to be mystified and ultimately rewarded from this trip, and when all is said and done, I hope that Michael and I, the documentary crew, the organisers, and even the other participants of the race, can all have a little bit of fun along the way. And let's not forget that this is a race. And let me tell you something about racing. It's not just about speed; it's about seizing every moment, pushing every limit, and conquering every challenge that comes your way. You've got to have nerves of steel and a heart of fire to succeed in this game. But let me tell you, when you taste victory after a hard-fought battle on the track, there's nothing quite like it in the world. You see, in racing, there's no room for hesitation. You've got to trust your instincts, trust your machine, and trust your team. Every decision counts, every manoeuvre matters. And when you're out there on the track, battling wheel-to-wheel with the best in the world, you've got to give it everything you've got. There's no time for doubt, no time for fear. It's just you, the road, and the burning desire to win.

Nigel Mansell, Day 1, race start wrote:Well, let me tell you, folks, Michael and I are gearing up for quite the adventure. We're setting off on a journey today that'll take us from the vibrant city of Cape Town, nestled at the southern tip of Africa, all the way up to the charming town of Aberdeen, right here in South Africa. Now, you might wonder why we're embarking on such a lengthy trek, but let me assure you, it's all about the journey, not just the destination. Our route, you see, winds its way through some of the most breathtaking landscapes you'll ever lay eyes on. From the sun-kissed vineyards of the Cape Winelands to the rugged beauty of the Drakensberg Mountains, every twist and turn of the road promises a new discovery, a new adventure. We'll pass through quaint little villages where time seems to stand still, and bustling towns where the pulse of Africa beats strong. But it's not just about the scenery, oh no. Along the way, we'll immerse ourselves in the rich tapestry of South African culture. We'll sample traditional dishes bursting with flavor, meet locals whose warmth and hospitality know no bounds, and delve into the fascinating history of this remarkable land. From the storied battlefields of the Anglo-Zulu War to the poignant reminders of apartheid's legacy, every stop on our journey is a lesson in resilience, courage, and hope. And let's not forget about the road itself. Oh, she's a demanding mistress, that's for sure. From smooth tarmac highways to dusty gravel tracks, we'll tackle every terrain imaginable with grit and determination. There'll be hairpin bends that test our nerve, long straight stretches that tempt us to put our foot down, and unexpected detours that lead us off the beaten path and into the heart of adventure. But through it all, Michael and I will be in good spirits, sharing stories, swapping jokes, and reveling in the sheer joy of exploration. Because at the end of the day, that's what this journey is all about – the thrill of the open road, the bonds of friendship, and the timeless allure of discovery. I mean, picture this, folks watching at home: a never-ending procession of miles upon miles of asphalt, stretching out before us like a ribbon of tarmac unfurling across the vast expanse of the African savanna. Each bend in the road, each twist of the highway, shall lead us further into the heart of this wild continent, where danger lurks around every corner and adventure beckons from every direction. And as we embark upon this epic odyssey, we shall encounter a cast of characters so diverse and colorful that even Shakespeare himself would marvel at their complexity. From the garrulous taxi drivers of Johannesburg to the taciturn shepherds of the Karoo, each interaction shall be a veritable Shakespearean drama unfolding before our very eyes. But fear not, my dear companions, for we shall not be daunted by the trials and tribulations that lie ahead. No, we shall face them head-on, with a steely resolve and a stiff upper lip worthy of the finest British gentlemen. For what is life without a challenge to overcome, a hurdle to surmount, or a detour to navigate?

After a succession of rest stops for the two elderly gentlemen, they stayed overnight in the Pagel House B&B in Aberdeen, South Africa, sipping away on a wickedly devilish gin and tonic before having some hard-earned rest.

Timestamp: 12:23 BST BST
https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Travali ... &entry=ttu

The alarm rings early on day 2, forcing the team to assemble on the bus and hit the road before they started serving breakfast. It's a fairly uneventful trip up the N1 towards the rest stop for today, the clouds appear to have cleared.

At the back of the bus, Steve and Angela continue to search for the Payload. Failure in this task is not an option - they've all been informed of the Consequences of not obtaining the goods. Still, they've until the end of the month to find it and dump the bus.

Passing Kimberley, Steve thinks he finds something - but it's just a roll of £50 notes. That will certainly come in handy at some point...

After a rest break, the gang plan their cover story for the evening's accommodation.

"We could say we're researching a route for a UK government trip to Africa" suggests Angela, a suggestion only met with a chorus of disbelief.
"Way to blow the cover, Ang!" exclaims Barry with several unprintable words.
"There's a TV crew following another contestant - some racing driver and Sarah Palin? - We could..."
"Sarah Palin? The US politician? You sure Ang?" questions Steve.
"Nah - she's full of s***, as always. It's bloody Michael Palin and our Nige" helpfully corrects Barry.

The group almost settle on a cover story revolving around being a scouting party for the TV show, but instead opt for a tale about British diplomats. After all, they have booked a 5 star lodge for a spot of wildlife 'viewing'. As for the bus, they'll explain it away with rumblings about discounts. Failing that, a few Rand should ease suspicions...

Pulling into the lodge, Barry decides to investigate the high-speed turning performance of the bus, which ends up stuck in the sand. The wheels spin like a market trader attempting to convince you the perfume is legitimate.

"For f-"

It's decided that Steve will stay aboard the bus with the Lee Enfield whilst the rest of the group will head down to the lodge for a tow.

54 minutes later the group return to the stranded bus with reserve staff aboard a Toyota Hilux.

"Wait - is that a man pissing on the bloody bus?!". Barry uses his vast vocabulary to describe what he'd like to do to the hooligans urinating on the bus. On closer inspection, the man is harmless - albeit pissed as a newt, and not just from the alcohol.

The commotion fails to wake Steve from his slumber as the bus is pulled into the lodge.
To be continued

Cape Town-Norway Cannonball Run - Day 2



The sounds of nearby sheeps woke me up from my slumber at around 8 AM. At least, it's better than an annoying rooster screaming its lungs out to wake everyone up. After eating a homemade egg sandwich, i surfed the web on my phone to find a place to stay in the capital of nearby Namibia, Windhoek, at the end of the second day of the cannonball run.



Eventually, i found a great deal for a room at Kate's Nest guesthouse, which is a similar kind of motel to Morewag Farm, except it looks more suburban. I managed to get a room for only 19$!



Of course, since i am going to Namibia, i made to sure to know if i had to declare the food and water bottles that i bought in Cape Town. Thankfully, i foujd my answer thanks to winipedia, which showed me the southern african customs union's page, complete with the rules and conditions instaured, which told me that i wouldn't have to declare at the border. Sweet!

With that info in tow, i was off and running along the highway towards the Namibian border at Vioolsdrift. The rain kept pouring sice yesterday, but as i got closer to the border, i could see the sky clearing up above, meaning i can finally go fast like i wanted to for Namibia.

The customs actually went pretty well. The customer even recomended me the next garage at nearby noordoewer checked, as well as warm me about the ongoing farmer strikes as i get near Windhoek.

With the sky clear as day and the road all clear, i could finally floor it and enjoy the power of the 2JZ engine as my supra finally roared to life. Along the way, i saw some curious animals wondering what that noise was. From the big, majestic Gensbok to cute little bat-eared foxes, and, surprisingly enough, Penguins! What the hell are Penguins doing here, in the desert? They must have been swept up by a big tsunami to end up here, of all places!







I then saw a couple of farmers doing a picket line, holding up signs and doing chants. I horned them in solidarity as i passed by. Man, imagine: while our quebec farmers are freezing their asses while striking, those people are doing it in the scorching hot rays of the desert sun. Goddamn, they are brave.

As i slowed down due to the traffic at Keetmanshoop, i took advantage by drinking some water and eat a chocolate bar. That is where i saw a group of farmers on the picket lines. They must be thirdting for water right now...

I then checked the amount of water bottles i had, and i bought two cases of 24 for the trip. I could give those farmers a few water bottles...

And so, i decided to stop and gave those brave strikers a bunch of bottles. The look of surprise and delight on their faces said it all, and thank god they speak english in Namibia! As a reward, when i told them that i'm going to windhoek, one of the farmers even told me that there is a hot spring not far north of Windhoek that i could go to refresh.

Holy shite! I always wanted my own hot springs episode!

And so, with renewed motivation, off i went to my destination: Windhoek, the capital of Namibia.



Wow, seeing a bastion of civilization in the middle of this desert...it's like Vegas...but cooler.

I then arrived at Kate's Nest Guesthouse. The receptionist wasn't named Kate, sadly, but she was sympathetic, and she showed me to the house i was staying in.



Damn, it looks like houses in my corner of the hood!

Inside, though, it was nice and cozy, similar to the morewag Farm.



After i ate another sandwich, i decided to check out where that hot springs that the striking farmer mentioned was...it was called the Gross Barman Hot Springs, and it was only an hour north from the city.



After arriving at the place, i smelled the fresh hot scent of the water pouring out of the pools. Sadly, i wasn't supposed to be naked, but it was still relaxing. I even did hot laps in the pool to get some cardio in.

Upon returning to Windhoek, i went back to the hotel and called it a day.

...why do i feel like i swam in piss at the hot springs?

https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Vioolsd ... ?entry=ttu

It is with regret I arrive a few minutes beyond the 10-hour deadline. The early morning rains in South Africa delayed the border crossing whilst Namibian farmers protested for better pay. Rain and Financial woes are two constant drags on humanity.

I am a man of the people and understand their struggle. Anyway, here is where I am staying for the night.




They also may or may not allow you to hunt Rhino here....

DAY TWO:
I awake at the Hollywood Lodge with a sore head. It was my thirtieth birthday yesterday, and I never expected to spend it with some Czech bikers in rural South Africa. I think we did three cases of Castle Lager between us whilst the Champions League was on. Anyway, a quick breakfast and time to hit the road once again. I say bye to the Czech lads, who were looking forward to a muddy day in the drizzling rain.


Czech motorbikes at Hollywood Lodge - Steinkopf, South Africa

Staying in Steinkopf, I did leave myself with somewhat of an option to go West to the coast if needed - however a short drive North was the Namibian border, and let's face it - we've got to go North to get to Norway. Thanks to the CTA, the border crossing was relatively straightforward.



Being in the south of Namibia, there is a significant German community - so it was quite entertaining to see roadside cafés mit Biergarten whilst on the long road towards Windhoek. Obviously there's a fair bit of colonial baggage to this, so I press onwards. Windhoek becomes the second capital I visit on the trip so far, and it seems a relatively clean and safe place. I continue North on the B1 and eventually see the sign for my accomodation for the night. I buzz on the gate of the compound at Omatozu Safaris and the wrought iron shifts aside to let my trusty Isuzu through. A friendly man greets me on arrival and we exchange pleasantries. At the end of our conversation, he throws me off a little bit. "We'll be up at 5 tomorrow morning for the Giraffes. Best time to see 'em. What firepower are you packing?" "Pardon?" Turns out this is one of those exclusive 'high ticket game' lodges you see those awful American dentists visiting to kill lions and elephants. There will be no innocent animal blood on my hands. I get to my digs and they're those expensive luxury tents. I think we'd call it 'glamping' in the UK. Quite nice really. Almost makes you forget you're sharing the compound with bloodthirsty Republican donors.




I'm hopeful to make Angola tomorrow. I was okay with the German, I don't speak a lick of Portuguese.

START: Hollywood Lodge and Green Jewel adventures, 30 Hall St, Steinkopf, 8244, South Africa

FINISH: Omatozu Safaris, B1, Okahandja, Namibia



TIME ELAPSED (TODAY): 9h11m
TIME ELAPSED (TOTAL): 16h46m

DISTANCE (TODAY): 971km
DISTANCE (TOTAL): 1636km

COUNTRIES VISITED: 2

PREVIOUSLY: PART ZERO () | PART ONE ()

Hanse Mandelson Music (@hansmanza) wrote: Seriously is this all there is to Namibia? @petepiet0 is so bored he even let me put my music on.



11:45 am · 10 Apr 2024

Hanse Mandelson Music (@hansmanza) wrote: Getting closer.



12:38 pm · 10 Apr 2024

Hanse Mandelson Music (@hansmanza) wrote: Highlight of the day so far! My turn to take the wheel now, Pete's knackered.



17:01 pm · 10 Apr 2024

Hanse Mandelson Music (@hansmanza) wrote: Had to turn around because of a protest on the way into Otijwarongo, but so glad we did! This place is legit, check out Outeniqua Farm if you're ever here.



21:44 pm · 10 Apr 2024

Link to Peter and Hanse's route:
https://maps.app.goo.gl/Z6PrB8NLxAnhm2qF9

April 9th
Finally! The rain had fully cleared up! As Yulia (always the earlier riser) pulled the blinds open to sunshine, things bade well for the day ahead, with the wide open road to Botswana beckoning. The lodge (1060 rand) was a quaint offering, with all the amenities one could expect lost in the beginnings of the South African bush. The farm stall was also the perfect spot to grab breakfast and replenish the snack supplies.




Disaster struck almost immediately. The British licence plate on the Discovery must have raised the ire of local sports fans, as the tyres on the Land Rover were fully deflated. The Kambro staff were as apologetic as one might expect, and helpfully suggested to head back to Britstown to get them looked at. While it was the wrong direction, it had the benefit of being nearby. As tempting as it was to soldier on, a broken wheel an hour later would be much much worse.

Driesie Tyre Services was effectively the first business you could see getting into town, and despite their tyres simply hanging out by a wall of the building, the service was rather better than anything Tom or his engineer friends could do considering the circumstances. With 30 minutes spent at the shop, the duo was free to resume their northward journey.



The bush was monotonous for a while and Strydenburg came and went, but soon after their traverse of Hopetown, Yulia tugged at Tom's t-shirt and announced "look at that river!"



A sign had just confirmed this was the Orange River, which marked the transition from the Great Karoo and its arid plains to the more stereotypical area that most would-be travellers imagine when the prospect of a South African trip pops into mind. Indeed, as the kilometres unfurled under their tyres, Tom and Yulia began to spot more and more signs promising safari experiences just off the road. Tom mused that the Namibia-bound teams would have crossed the same river a few hours previously. Kimberley was up ahead.

With the first medium-sized city since Cape Town came an opportunity to check in on road conditions ahead. While South Africa had been getting better and better - with virtually no delays beyond a quarter of an hour from a remaining landslip caused by the previous day's problems - a check of the news while stopping for lunch quickly revealed that the thunderstorms had merely shifted north, wreaking havoc in southern Botswana and taking precious resources away from the border crossings.

As admin delays were not deductible from driving time, this threw a spanner into the works. They theoretically still had enough time to reach Gaborone, but a 90-minute wait at the border would run out the clock before they could enter. A change of plan was required, and the safari lodges would prove key to it working out.

Continuing north past some precious mineral mines of the sort that Elon Musk's family definitely never owned, the town of Warrenton was where the decision would manifest itself. Rather than turn left onto route 18 towards Gaborone, they stuck on route 12, headed for Johannesburg. Other teams following their transponder movements may have been wondering why, as it seemed to be avoiding both Lesotho and Botswana for no real distance advantage. And they would be correct to do so. Up until our protagonists reached Wolmaransstad. There, they stopped for a few minutes at the incongruously-located Wimpy for a burger...



...and turned north onto the R505. From there, it was a hodge podge of corn farms and gold and diamond mines through Lichtenburg and its Boer War history, Ottoshoop and its former trading glory, and Zeerust's place as a gateway to the game reserves to the north. Vegetation was growing thicker and human population sparser. Soon, all there was was road. Then, the safari signs re-appeared. There was more than enough time left on the clock to get to the border, but not enough to cross it. This made the final destination easy to settle on: the Last Word lodge at Madikwe Game Reserve, barely 25km away from Gaborone, yet safely on the other side of the border.



As befits such a high-end lodge in a game reserve that ostensibly presents itself as a conservation area, it's rather pricey (over 10 times as much as the previous night at 18 500 rand), but hey, plenty more time to save up down the line, and the happy couple could enjoy an unexpected evening of luxury. Tomorrow: Botswana beckons.

Kambro Accommodation and Farmstall Britstown to Last Word Madikwe

8h26 at time of checking, plus 45 minutes penalty
801km
19 560 rand

https://maps.app.goo.gl/xrY6exkpYqMgHbRu6

The Drivers' Journal - by Monika Flater and James Wilmington
Entry 2

Around 7:00 in the morning we received an update from Nessa, the lead organizer. TBA was part of a chunk of competitors driving towards the Namibian border, and according to the universal competitor tracker, we were a little behind. We did make the top 10 of driving distance though, which got us a point in the daily standings shown below:

NC: Mario Lafleur, Busboys, "Pinkd56", Kondo Chukwunyelu, "Klon", Nessa - 0pts
10th: Team Bert Anzungolst - 1pt
9th: "Frogfoot" - 2pts
8th: Aniinha Ruohonen & Amanda Grönroos - 4pts
7th: The Monster Truckers - 6pts
6th: Mateo Machado & Co. - 8pts
5th: "Shadazy" - 10pts
4th: Petteri Poskiparta - 12pts
3rd: Dangerous Dave's Racing Rappers - 15pts
2nd: Yulia & Thomas de Bock - 18pts
1st: Nigel the Navigator - 25pts

Great Guido Forti! Nigel was in it after all, and he was leading! Apparently his crew waited for the parking lot to clear out at the beginning.
Nessa also joined the race and let the others have a head start. Bad news for us though, as our tracking device detected someone deflating our tyres. Something to do with a farmers' strike apparently, which Nessa said would hold us up in Namibia.

James' Stint

finishing this later

Monika's Stint

finishing this later

bathplug YEAH MONSTER TRUCKS: Log 001-2

So, as it turns out, there was one fella interested in joining my little escapade. I didn’t care enough to catch his name, but due to his interesting attire, I decided to call him Ron Burgundy (like the fella from Anchorman y’know? Cause look at that suit right, that’s burgundy. I’m so bloody smart).



I have no clue what we’re gonna do. I ate at the amazingly named “The Sweaty Dutchman”, which I think was some kind of bistro? IDK we had a good laugh. We’re gonna go to the Prince George Circuit as we intended, maybe do a lap or two if we can? Whatever, I’ve been liking this country so far, nothing remotely has gone wrong which I’m kinda shocked by. Well, I’ll see you tomorrow for my next log!

bathplug YEAH MONSTER TRUCKS: Log 002-1

I hate this country.

They stole one of our tyres. I’m going to say that again. They stole one of our tyres. They STOLE a tyre on a MONSTER TRUCK. They did it while we slept. They did it without waking anyone or making anyone question it. How? HOW???? I’m pissed off. We’re gonna go to some Dunlop place, and see if they have any wheels or whatever. I’ll see you in half an hour.

bathplug YEAH MONSTER TRUCKS: Log 002-2
Good news: they had a conveniently monster truck shaped tyre! I’m almost certain they stole it just to sell it back to us, which sucks, but we other side had zero choice. Just a quick note, Ron Burgandy somehow found an entire crate of beers while we waited for the tyre to get fitted. God I still can’t get over how they did that- but whatever not important right now. Good ol Ron decided right then and there to get absolutely blackout drunk, he fell asleep about an hour before now. Oh, I should mention, I’m at that bloody circuit, and apparently they don’t allow monster trucks on the circuit, or even the car park. It’s an absolute liberty if I’m honest but hey doesn’t matter. We’re off to Durban next. Let’s just pray we don’t hit anything.

bathplug YEAH MONSTER TRUCKS: Log 002-3
We didn’t get to Durban, but we got to some lodge or inn or whatever. This time I can’t be bothered to tell you what it called instead of me just being unable to. Mr Burgandy seems to be a raging alcoholic because he’s gone off to find a pub. He hasn’t come back yet which concerns me quite a lot after the whole tyre fiasco.

Oh I should mention, I did get on that track… I did have to do a couple of… legally questionable manoeuvres with no casualties (I… think?), but hey WE GOT A LAP. It certainly wasn’t a track record, about 2 minutes 50 seconds, but we got a lap.

I should also probably put the route we took here eh?


I’m tired, I’m going to sleep. I’m done with today.

The first stop is for the tyre change.
The second "stop" is a border crossing into Lesotho.

Timestamp: 2024-04-11 16.36.56

Leg 2: Richmond, Northern Cape, South Africa -> Radikhudu, North West, South Africa

859 km in 9 h 3 min at 17:44 (UTC+3).

Above is the recorded route of Nigel Mansell, Michael Palin, and their documentary crew. They finished their day at St. Andrew's Hotel and Spa in northern Johannesburg, conveniently located between the Royal Johannesburg Golf Club and the Glendower Golf Club. Below reads the unedited excerpt of Nigel's diary entry for the day.

Nigel Mansell, speaking into a dictaphone (do people still use dictaphones?) wrote:Is this on? *cough* Hello, ladies and gentlemen at home. It is the afternoon of Day 2 here at the emerald confines of the prestigious Royal Johannesburg Golf Club. Oh, what a splendid locale it is, a sanctuary where the harmonious symphony of nature meets the indomitable spirit of competition, beckoning forth the likes of stalwarts and neophytes alike to partake in the timeless dance upon the verdant stage of golfing splendor. Picture, if you will, the break of dawn, when the ethereal luminescence of the rising sun gently kissed the dew-dappled grass, casting an enchanting aura upon the landscape, as if Nature herself had adorned the canvas with her finest strokes. Ah, such moments of celestial serenity serve as a prelude to the exhilarating odyssey that awaited, a journey fraught with trials and triumphs, where every stroke of the club resonated with the pulse of anticipation and the promise of conquest. As I stood upon the hallowed grounds of the Royal Johannesburg Golf Club, a sense of reverence washed over me, for I was but a humble disciple amidst the grandeur of this venerable institution, humbly paying homage to the legacy of those who had tread these very paths before me. The air was imbued with an aura of camaraderie, as fellow enthusiasts exchanged jovial banter and good-natured jests, united by a shared passion for the noble pursuit of golf. Ah, but let us not dally in the realm of preamble, for the true essence of my tale lies in the spirited exploits that transpired upon the emerald tapestry of the golf course itself. With a resolute heart and a gleam of determination in my eye, I embarked upon the arduous yet exhilarating quest to conquer the formidable challenges that lay in wait, each fairway and green a testament to the cunning craftsmanship of the course's designers. The first tee beckoned like a siren's call, its pristine expanse a canvas upon which dreams and aspirations were to be etched in the annals of sporting history. With a graceful flourish, I addressed the ball, the hallowed silence of the moment punctuated only by the rhythmic cadence of my heartbeat. And then, with a swift yet graceful swing, the ball soared through the azure expanse, tracing a graceful arc against the boundless sky before alighting upon the distant fairway with a satisfying thud. As the day unfolded, each hole presented its own unique set of challenges, from treacherous bunkers to cunningly contoured greens that tested the mettle of even the most seasoned golfing savants. Yet amidst the crucible of competition, there existed a palpable sense of camaraderie, as adversaries became comrades-in-arms, united in their reverence for the sanctity of the sport. Oh, but let us not forget the joyous interlude of respite and reprieve, where the clubhouse served as a sanctuary for weary travelers in need of sustenance and libation. Amidst the convivial atmosphere of laughter and merriment, tales of triumph and tribulation were exchanged like currency, each anecdote a testament to the indomitable spirit of human endeavor. And so, as the sun began its gradual descent towards the western horizon, casting a golden hue upon the landscape, I found myself reflecting upon the wondrous tapestry of experiences that had unfolded throughout the day. The Royal Johannesburg Golf Club had proven to be not merely a crucible of competition, but a veritable crucible of the human spirit, where bonds were forged amidst the crucible of competition and memories were etched upon the annals of time. In conclusion, dear friends, allow me to express my heartfelt gratitude for allowing me the privilege of sharing with you this tale of sporting splendor and camaraderie. May the spirit of the Royal Johannesburg Golf Club continue to inspire generations of enthusiasts to embrace the noble pursuit of golf, and may the bonds forged amidst the crucible of competition serve as a testament to the enduring power of the human spirit. Michael travelled with me here, but he went to bed early.

The British world champion, pictured on the podium at the 1985 South African Grand Prix

Alas, the first leg went well! I suffered no damage and physically I am ok. So let me show you how my second leg will go!



I have to stop to pick up some chocolate which will lose me a few minutes, I will then make my way into Nambia, which was a last minute change due to some errors in the maps I had brought with me. Oh well!

Timestamp: 11th of April, 4:53PM Est

Day 2:
Stopping point: Verykykerskop Central Hotel, Verkykerskop, Vrystaat
Border crossings: 2 (South Africa -> Lesotho, Lesotho -> South Africa)
Timestamp: 2024-04-11 UTC 21:32

Day 2: Mistakes & Borders



AMETH: Why did you go to sleep late, Mateo?
MATEO: Petteri, Shadazy & I got into quite the ARWS discussion. We lost track of time afterwards.
AMETH: Will you be okay?
MATEO: Eh, I'm decently functional, I'll live. How's the day looking?
ERIS: Good news, we won't have to deal with the rain. Bad news, the farmers strike is still ongoing.
MATEO: Hopefully we won't be held up too long.
AMETH: Um, I just saw something on Twitter...
MATEO: No more delays, please.
AMETH: Oh don't worry it's nothing do do with us.
AMETH: It's just that I saw a video of someone vandalizing the Brexit bus.
MATEO: ...
ERIS: ...
ERIS: How about we just leave?
MATEO: Good idea.

ROUTE:



Start: Vioolsdrift Lodge, Vioolsdrif, South Africa
End: The Farmhouse, Otjozondjupa Region, Namibia
Distance: 972km
Time: 9h 18min (+35 min delay)
Recorded at: 23:20, 11/04/2024

Total distance: 1707km
Total time: 16h 58min (+2h 35min delays)
Countries: South Africa, Namibia

Locale of the Day: Windhoek



MATEO: Ladies, I have a question.
ERIS: Okay, shoot.
MATEO: Why me? Why, of all people, did you make me your third wheel?
AMETH: The third wheel bit was a bit harsh.
ERIS: Well, he's not wrong, love...
ERIS: But to answer your question, we picked you since you're this universe's equivalent of a close friend of ours.
MATEO: ...
MATEO: You're literally the Ameth & Eris from my own damn fanfic.
AMETH: Eh?
MATEO: You already know that your universe is, from my perspective, that of a mobile game called Princess Connect.
MATEO: Well, I have a fanfic called Log Out Club, where you two end up in a relationship.
MATEO: It stars Daichi, a shameless self-insert who I'm guessing is said friend.
AMETH: Yeah, that's him alright.
ERIS: Okay now I'm curious. Where can I read it?
MATEO: Uuuuuuh haven't gone round to actually doing it because procrastination. I have started doing it, though & when I'm done, I'll post it on Pixiv.

At The Farmhouse:
ERIS: Well, this is rather rustic.
MATEO: Eh, not like we'll be here long. Plus I prefer staying in flats rather than hotels when abroad.
AMETH: When in Rome, do as Romans do.
ERIS: And there less risk of you ending up in an extended conversation late into the night, since we're the only ones here.
MATEO: I'm not living that one down, am I?
AMETH: No.
ERIS: No.

Well we had a good night sleep, the sunset was absolutely stunning, and the farm environment was a welcome change from.... the countryside we usually live in. But something about the mentality here is just a lot more relaxing. As we got in touch with the competitors, we heared some have had a bit of trouble with local hooligans. Quite unfortunate, but it seems they've all been able to navigate their way around it.



There seem to still have been 2 main tactics, a lot of guys went north directly trough Namibia. At first glance, they made quite a lot of progress. A different group was staying fairly close to the Botswanese border. Stopping right before the border as the weather was a bit rough over there.

A very small group also decided to stop in Lesotho to the confusion of the Lesothan people why a vegan oil powered Mercedes with a suspiciously tall German (they can recognise a German easily) was passing there, but seem to leave almost immediatly.

The monstertruck is still hugging the eastcoast, it's yet unclear if this will be a good strategy or not. They seem to have planned to visit a few historic racing related places along the way, which is certainly interesting. I don't think there's gonna be much historic circuits once they leave South-Africa though.
It also seems that Nickydustyowls route trough the middle wasa bit misguided as it would have required him to cross the Kalahari Desert. He decide he didn't want to die yet and joined the others in Namibia, quite a way behind though.

Not much of note about my own route, i'm just playing chase here, with so far very little opportunity to really close up.


When i took a look at the hotels, i noticed some people were staying at quite unethical places, i hope they don't get into trouble with some post-woke mob later in Europe.

Some of the participants managed to not arrive on time, getting some penalties, here's the list:
Girry: 20 mins overtime: 100 mins less to drive.
Pasta: 20 mins overtime: 100 mins less to drive.
Shadaza: 4 mins overtime: 20 mins less to drive
When it comes to least distance covered overall, that's obviously still my own entry as i'm a day behind. The participants have done 878 km on average today which is quite a lot.

With the amount of countries crossed, not a lot as changed, some have added Namibia to their list, some have added Lesotho to their list, and some are still inside of South-Africa

In the points, Girry is smashing everyone today, but not without getting penalties for it tomorrow. A similar story with second placed Shadaza.
Surpringly, old veteran TommyKl scores no points today because of the setback he got. The consistency of Aislabie, getting third again is also quite interesting.

25 Girry
18 Shadaza
15 Aislabie
12 Pinkd56
10 DigitDan7
8 Kinnikuniverse
6 Rob Dylan
4 pasta_maldonado
2 Nessafox
1 Nuppiz


These are today's points, overall it looks like this.

37 Girry
31 Rob Dylan
30 Aislabie
28 Shadaza
18 TommyKl
18 DigitDan7
12 Pinkd56
8 Kinnikuniverse
6 Loadsamoney
5 Nuppiz
4 pasta_maldonado
2 Nessafox
2 Frogfoot9013
1 Forti
0 Klon
0 NickyDustyOwl


In the overal rankings we see Girry take the top spot, but old Nige seems to hang on quite well. Klon and NickyDustyowl have yet to score points.



Some rng's for tomorrow:

South Africa
Weather (% rain)
100% west , no rng needed, also, what are you still doing on the westcoast
90% east
36, you won't lose more than half an hour
TommyKl, Nuppiz and Pasta Maldondo will only lose 5 mins if they go directly into Botswana.
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
9, the robbers got what they wanted, you'll be left alone today.




Lesotho
Weather (% rain) 90%, possibly thunderstorms
23, minor rain, you'll lose max. 30 mins
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
39 Locals look at you with confusion, but feel no need to harass you.

Eswatini
Weather (% rain) 90%
19, Manages to copy Lesotho again
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
24, Everything Lesotho does, Eswatini does

Namibia
Weather (% rain) 0% no rng needed
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
34 everything chill under the sun


Botswana
Weather (% rain) 90%, possibly thunderstorms
99% Threatening clouds, but you escape without delay
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
27, people are less threatening

Zimbabwe
Weather (% rain) 10%
81, it's suspiciously dry in Zimbabwe these days.
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
36, the locals think finding water is a bigger priority

Mozambique
Weather (% rain) 70%
88, cloudy sky, but dry
Political unrest (% of something happening) 10-20%
40 Not today

Angola
Weather (% rain) 20%, more than 30°C
88, dry, and fairly hot to westerners standards, stop at least 2 time to buy additional drinks.
Political unrest (% of something happening) 5-10% general, 20-50% in Cabinda
72 general, 71 in Cabinda you'll be fine, to your own surprise.

Zambia
Weather (% rain) 20%
56, perfect driving weather.
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
53 perfect athmosphere too

Malawi
Weather (% rain) 20%
45 Malawi isn't going to ruin your day either.
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
Unless? 72.. nah

Madagascar
Weather (% rain) 40%
57, dry
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
21%, safe, also why are you even here?


Random object generator: chicken
Rng result: 9
@Klon has to find Chicken in some shape or form.

@ Loadsamoney monster truck rng for damage
Chance of hitting something rng: 9%
Rng results: 66, is lucky again


@Pastamaldonado leave bus rng for getting stuck somewhere
Chance of getting stuck rng 6%
Rng results 8, You're pushing your luck buddy, but you make it.
Rng of time lost: n/a
Rng chance of attraction unwanted attention: 65%
51 Boris Johnsson follows you on X, you get constantly bothered by really, really, weird questions , takes you half an hour to find the mute button.



Leg 3 is open now, you have until saturday 13th of april, 23:59 GMT+1 Brussels Time to complete your route.

Sleeping in a farm has it's downsides that it gets noisy the moment the sun rises, the benefit of course is that you, you know, actually wake up. After i explained to the hosts and other guests what i'm doing with this american police car and trailer, they were... confused, but thankfully they speak Dutch here so i have no problems explaining stuff (contrary to home, somehow) They were all super nice and i left the day with a big smile. Some guys were asking if we could give them a lift to Kimberley, since we got plenty of space anyway. We did that, thankfully i have my trailer. Packing and unpacking took a bit more time than expected, but thankfully i could stop the clock.

Now it would keep raining quite a bit in South Africa. Though the scenery was pretty, we'd get tired of it soon. We passed the town of Kimberley where we dropped off our guests. There where some fans were cheering for us, some of the other competitors must have passed here as they were waiving Belgian flags. When we reached Rustenburg the scenery started to change and got more green again. The landscape was pretty, we saw a few cool animals, though we didn't really have time to check what they were. We decided not to go to Botswana but stay in South-Africa, as they speak my language here.
At some point we saw a road marking saying Bulge River, and an advertisment for a Wedding Logde up ahead. We wisely decided to ignore that and stay in one of those Safari places (Anro Safaris, Portion 4 Of The Farm Slangfontein, 641lq, Lephalale, 0555, Zuid-Afrika) This place is very pretty, and the environment is astonishing, we should really protect these kinds of places.
It was already quite late when i got into my room. Someone invited me to go to that wedding lodge as a security guard... i just rolled with it and faked my best American accent. A strange man was also trying to lure me back to Bulge River, i quickly answered with my own bulge... with that i obviously mean this fake gun i was carrying that came with the truck! Not something else!

https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Gannaho ... &entry=ttu timestamp 0:31

DAY THREE:
I leave my tent on the murder compound fairly briskly, so I don't run the risk of pissing off any republicans. Where am I going? Well, north obviously. I opt to take a slightly more scenic route today, taking in the sights of the stunning Etosha Salt Pan on the way to the Oshikango border crossing with Angola.

A brief interlude at the border, and we cross into country three, Angola!

It's mere minutes before I'm sweating absolute buckets once I cross into the former Portuguese colony. I power onto Ondjiva, a small city - and take a short comfort break in a ShopRite supermarket. After purchasing four big bottles of water, I continue on my way to Xangongo - where I stop once again - this time in a Bar. Three ice cold cans of Sumol later, I am still flagging. With the clock heading into the ninth hour, I come to a stop in the town of Cahama. I find lodgings in the Pesao Cahama Guest House, next to a café on the main drag.

Cahama doesn't get many tourists, so they manage to find me a room - and we experience our first shared bathroom of the trip. Mother of god.



This is a far cry from the luxury of the last few days. I hear rodents scuttering on the roof and I decide to bail. I take a short drive along the road and spot a familiar hanky Ford Fiesta pickup truck parked outside PS SHIYOVA-COMERCIAL, some form of Spartan lodging. They've got a room. It'll do.



START: Omatozu Safaris, B1, Okahandja, Namibia

FINISH: PS SHIYOVA-COMERCIAL, Cahama, Angola





TIME ELAPSED (TODAY): 9h26m
TIME ELAPSED (TOTAL): 25h12m

DISTANCE (TODAY): 879km
DISTANCE (TOTAL): 2515km

COUNTRIES VISITED: 3

PREVIOUSLY: PART ZERO () | PART ONE () | PART TWO ()


Peter and Hanse's route today:
https://maps.app.goo.gl/tuBjEjP5h6uPLfh18

Once again, the narrative bit will be edited in later on.

Angola is dire.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1n35yAr ... p=drivesdk

Cape Town-Norway Cannonball Run - Day 3 - Arrival in Angola


That was a good night sleep. And thankfully, i didn't smell like piss. That hot springs was relaxing, but i still had that feeling about the pool's water....

As i checked on my phone for any information  concerning Angola and a nearby hotel close to the border, i read that it is scorching hot over there. I mean, Namibia is pretty hot, and i survived. What's another desert gonna do to yours truly?

I also read that they speak portuguese in Angola, so it would be sensible to go to a book store here in Windhoek and buy a learning book so to speak the language of the legend Pele.

After i did so, i had breakfast at the Karl List Mall here, in Windhoek, at a place called Cafe Schneider. Sadly, there was no hot dogs, but i ate a nice little spaghetti meat balls with veggies combo.






While i ate my breakfast, i not only learned a few basic phrases in Portuguese, but i also checked on my phone for an hotel in Angola. After a lot of searching everywhere on google, i finally found one that looked rather chill: Villa Okapale, in Ondijva, a little bit beyond the borders. The price was even really, really good for the night.

Off i went towards the Angolan border. The Supra is still a wonderful beast, roaring along the highway as i flew away. Apparently, i am becoming a bit of a famlus figure, as news of me giving water bottles apparently spread, for the striking farmers in towns that i passed by cheered for me everytime they saw the white Supra.

As i entered Otavi, my eyes didn't deceive me: there was green and even a bit of forest surrounding me as the road temporarily gave me a rspite from the desertic landscapes. Indeed, i was passing near the famed Etosha national park, one of the many wildlife reserves in Namibia. On the road, i saw a few beautiful beasts such as Giraffes, various cats, cape foxes, Zebras and various rodents and boks, as well as a tribe of Wildebeests. Its like i was at the Parc Safari all over again!




After a few more hours, the border was in sights. Angola was waiting. Already, i started to feel rather hot...and i didn't even arrive at the border yet! The customs were...a bit longer than last time out. Thankfully, the customer spoke english, telling me that my attempts at speaking pork n cheese was welcome...but rubbish.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, i was cleared to go.

And so, off i went towards Villa Okapale, with the Angolan desert in the background..


Oof...

Oh god...

Oh Jesus...

bathplug HELL, WHY IS THIS SO HOT??

i couldn't take it anymore, so i stopped at a cantina in Santa Clara to drink a few water bottles. Thank god i still had some from the cases i gave to the farmers in Namibia, because holy hell, is this hot! It's even hotter than in Vegas!



Using a wet debarbouillete to hydrate myself, i continued a little while, since i'm close to the Villa. Then, i noticed on the GPS that there was a supermarket at the upcoming exit. And so, i stopped at Empresa Sul Plastico Comercial whatever to drink.more water and refill the cooler with even more water bottles and food.




The air conditioning in the supermarket was soooo welcome! I stayed perhaps a bit longer than i should, for one of the retail workers told me that i couldn't stay sitted in the folding chair on display for long. A shame. That chair was so cozy...


Finally, after putting a bit more gas in the tank for the next day, i finally arrived at Ondijva and, by extension, at the Villa. It was a serene place, a little building that is actually a bit similar to the previous guest houses that i slept in.






I crashed into the bed, taking in the fresh air coming from the AC. Holy shite, man...it's like i stepped into the lungs of hell...i hurriedly found the next jotel i am staying in. Thankfully, it was along the coast, in Benguela, a city that looks much nicer than what i saw so far...the only problem? It's almost 9 and a half hours from here...

Sweet Jesus...




To Be Continued...

The Drivers' Journal - by Monika Flater and James Wilmington
Entry 3

https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Ababis+ ... ?entry=ttu

Narration will be done when it's done.

On Day 3, Mansell, Palin and crew travel north-east from Johannesburg/Pretoria, cross the border into Zimbabwe, and drive as far as they can make it. They stop in a motel in a small town called Ngundu.

Nigel Mansell (excerpts found on tape recorder) wrote:*Coughing* ***RECORDING LOST*** Day 3, goodness gracious. Hello, ladies and gentlemen. As we cross the Zimbabwean border, I can't help but feel a surge of excitement coursing through my veins. There's something truly magical about the open road, isn't there? The sense of freedom, the thrill of the unknown, it's like poetry in motion. And what better way to experience it than behind the wheel of a finely-tuned machine, ready to conquer any challenge that comes our way. Our journey begins in the vibrant city of Johannesburg, where the hustle and bustle of urban life give way to the wide-open spaces of the countryside. It is excellent golf country here, and I for one will be devastated to be leaving the Royal Johannesburg Golf Club behind me, as Michael and I tucked into our delicious four-course breakfast and got back on the road. As we left the city limits behind and ventured out onto the open road, I couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of the South African landscape unfolding before us. Rolling hills, lush greenery, and endless blue skies stretch out in every direction, a canvas painted with the colors of adventure ***RECORDING LOST*** yet, despite the trials and tribulations, there is a sense of joy in the air, a feeling of camaraderie that binds us together as fellow travelers on this great adventure ***RECORDING LOST*** it's not the destination that matters, but the journey itself. The memories we make, the friendships we forge, and the stories we share along the way, these are the true treasures of the ***RECORDING LOST*** as we finally arrive in Ngundu, weary but triumphant, I can't help but feel a sense of pride swell within me. ***RECORDING LOST*** We conquered the road, we defied the odds, and we emerged victorious ***RECORDING LOST*** So let us raise a toast to our journey (with a nice gin and tonic no less), to the roads we've travelled and the adventures still to come. For as long as there are highways to roam and horizons to chase, the spirit of the road will live on in our hearts, forever and always ***RECORDING LOST***

Picture unrelated

ChatGPT's suggestion about what 24 MANSELL is eating for dinner this evening wrote:Ah, now that's an interesting question! Given Nigel Mansell's background and the likely setting of a motel after a long road trip, let's imagine he's opting for something hearty and satisfying, yet still with a touch of indulgence to reward himself for a successful journey. Perhaps he's treating himself to a classic steak dinner.

Picture this: Nigel strides into the motel's restaurant, still buzzing with the adrenaline of the road but ready to unwind and refuel. He takes a seat at a cozy booth, his appetite whetted by the day's adventures. After perusing the menu, his eyes light up as he spots the perfect choice: a succulent ribeye steak, cooked to perfection and accompanied by a generous serving of creamy mashed potatoes and sautéed vegetables.

As he waits for his meal to arrive, Nigel takes a moment to reflect on the day's journey, savoring the memories of the open road and the camaraderie shared with fellow travelers. But soon enough, his thoughts are interrupted by the arrival of his dinner, a mouthwatering masterpiece of sizzling steak and savory sides.

With gusto, Nigel digs in, savoring each juicy bite with the gusto of a true connoisseur. The rich flavors dance across his palate, a symphony of taste and texture that satisfies both body and soul. And as he leans back in his seat, a contented smile playing on his lips, Nigel knows that this meal is more than just sustenance—it's a celebration of a journey well-traveled and a hunger well-sated.

Day 1: We woke up from our accomodation at The Owl & Pussycat and drove to the official starting point at the parking lot. As the weather on the west coast was atrociously bad and on the journey here we had found out that the windshield wipers on the Volvo left a lot to be desired, we decided to head northeast... towards Johannesburg, where we got the car from. So we were going to see the same sights towns and gas stations as just a couple of days prior. While we had bought some snacks from Cape Town, the traffic was atrocious and they were long gone by the halfway point of the journey, so we were starting to feel peckish. Unfortunately we couldn't find any decent places to eat at until Beaufort West, where we stopped at the 4 Sheep Restaurant Deli and Convenience Store. We ordered ourselves some very tasty steak and chips, and once we had finished eating got some water and dried meat from the convenience store to last for the rest of that day's driving. Finally, after nearly nine hours of driving we reached Richmond and booked ourselves to the ANRA Rusgenot Guest House, the same place we had stayed at on our journey towards Cape Town. As we hadn't really planned where we were going tomorrow, we made sure to get a decent haul of groceries from the nearby Spar SaveMor so we won't be stranded in the middle of nowhere with nothing to eat or drink.

Day 2: We got the first reports of how other people had been doing, and it didn't sound good. Seems that even though the west coast had terrible weather, people had still made long strides towards Namibia due to more favorable traffic conditions. Instead of heading much further towards east, we dcided to beeline towards north and Botswana to make up for lost time. We'd still be spending almost half of the day on the N1 road, but got off it just after Bloemfontein, where we also made a quick refuelling stop at the Shell Ultra City. We streched our legs a bit but didn't stop by at the café as we still had plenty left to eat from the shopping trip in Richmond. While continuing on towards Botswana we heard from the radio that the weather there was pretty bad, so we changed our plans from crossing the border to stopping just before it. The small town of Radikhudu was the closest we could find next to a decent road, so we set our navigator to point there. After another ~250 km of driving we were getting a bit tired, so we had another pitstop in Wolmaransstad. We couldn't exit South Africa without eating at least once at a Wimpy, and we also filled up the car's gas tank just to make sure. And since it was right next door, we also shopped at the local Spar. The rest of the journey went smoothly, and once we arrived at the guesthouse in Radikhudu we didn't waste time getting in their swimming pool!

Leg 3: Radikhudu, North West, South Africa -> 54 km north of Nata, Central District, Botswana

764 km in 10 h at 10:19 (UTC+3)

Day 3: Rain greeted us in the morning, but the weather in Botswana had cleared, so we headed across the border at the Pioneer's gate border crossing. We had to spend a bit of time waiting for all the truck traffic to pass through, and also noticed we were running out of fuel. Fortunately, there was a Shell right across the border. For whatever reason we were unable to find a decent grocery store in the border town of Lobatse, but figured out there would be plenty at the nation's capital Gaborone which wasn't too far along the road. Sure enough, right at the outskirts of the city we found a shopping mall and a Spar to refill our food and drink situation. As we passed through the city Amanda looked at the maps and noticed there's not a whole lot of decently-sized towns along the way, but since we had lost so much time on the first two legs we decided to push on as long as we could. We passed through Mahalapye, then Palapye, then Shashe Mooke... we were in a desperate need of a break. The car was in a desperate need of a break. Finally we reached Francistown, and had a break at the local Wimpy and made sure to refuel the car as well, as we had done over 500 km in one stretch. We flipped a coin to decide whether we'd head northeast towards Zimbabwe, or northwest towards Zambia. The coin toss decided we're going towards Zambia, and had a look at the tourist map we got in Francistown. Apparently there was a lodge we could use in the middle of nowhere, but getting there would be a stretch. As we were heading for a long stretch of road with no towns whatsoever, we stopped by in Nata for groceries and a bit more fuel. Time was running out, and just after we turned off the A33 road towards our lodging the time was up. We had to go a few minutes overtime to reach our destination, but after losing so much time previously we didn't really mind the time penalty we'd have to serve next day. Time to freshen up a bit and look at some elephants!

Chicken. Plucking chicken!? The shite I put up with...


The first stop is a supermarket, which had a sale on chicken braal and feet yesterday, so there'll be other chicken parts available as well.
The second "stop" is a border crossing into eSwatini

Timestamp: 2024-04-12 13.40.15

https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Otjiwa+ ... ?entry=ttu

Penalties compounding into penalties! as I went 7 minutes over the deadline as I duck for cover from Nessa's rage.

I may be in hot water, but I did stop for water, in the hot.

Agent Shadaza checking in just at the limits of acceptability. Thanks, Obama!

Timestamp: 12:00 BST
https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Kurrich ... &entry=ttu

Story to be updated later.

Timestamp: 1:27PM EST

[Not in the zone to type story so lets assume Kondo was too busy and tired to write]

I also can’t be asked to do a write up right now, it’ll be done soon enough and this will either be edited or replied to. Either way, I’ve finally crossed a border!

Day Three:
Stopping point: Marracuen hostel, Movedja, Mozambique.
Borders crossed: South Africa -> eSwatini, eSwatini -> Mozambique

With one hour to go, 2 people have yet to post their route, they sitll have an hour to do so, however i'm quite tired so i'm going to post the rng for tomorrow already.





Some people are really struggling trough Angola, more or less sticking to the same idea, but on the eastern side, people are doing very diverse tactics to get there. Notably is Girry who is going right trough the centre. On average 789 km has been covered today

In the least amount of km's covered we got this stand, i am still leading as i'm a day behind, but i'm catching up to the Lesotho/Eswatini gang and the Brexit bus. It's a bit harder to say who's got the advantage here

1702 Nessafox
2038 Frogfoot9013
2161 Klon
2162 Loadsamoney
2199 pasta_maldonado

In the most countries crossed, Frogfoot9013 takes the lead by now having crossed 4 countries.

Regarding the points: NickyDustyowl gets a lot of km's in an unrejectifies himself with a stage win! Meanwhile Aislabie finishes second, again!

25 NickyDustyOwl 928
18 Forti 963
15 Aislabie 912
12 Shadaza 909
10 DigitDan7 886
8 Pinkd56 879
6 Nessafox 834
4 TommyKl 818
2 Kinnikuniverse 794
1 Nuppiz 764

Overall, Aislabie and Shadaza's consistency means they are taking the lead! Only Digitdan7 and Nuppiz have been able to score points in each stage, with Klon still at a total amount of 0 points.

45 Aislabie
40 Shadaza
37 Girry
31 Rob Dylan
28 DigitDan7
25 NickyDustyOwl
22 TommyKl
20 Pinkd56
19 Forti
11 Kinnikuniverse
8 Nessafox
6 Loadsamoney
6 Nuppiz
4 pasta_maldonado
2 Frogfoot9013
0 Klon


Penalty points:
Nuppiz is 3 minutes over time, they lose 15 mins next day.
Shadaza is 7 minutes over time, they lose 35 mins the next day
TommyKL 9 mins overtime: 45 mins lost the next day
Pasta maldonado: 6 mins overtime, will lose 30 mins next day

Aislabie and Pinkd56 are sharing a hotel, rng for chance of exhaustion 52, rng result 20
Both having to sleep together in what is a barely finished hotel, plus their frustration on Angola means they oversleep.
Rng: Aislabie oversleeps 29 mins
Rng: Pinkd56 oversleeps 92 mins


Weather (% rain)
90% east
42, you will lose an hour
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
31, life's peaceful here

Lesotho
Weather (% rain) 90%, possibly thunderstorms
66, you lose 90 minutes
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
7, locals are getting a bit tired of you still being around

Eswatini
Weather (% rain) 90%
28, you'll lose half an hour
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
73, hakuna matata

Namibia
Weather (% rain) 0% no rng needed
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
49

Botswana
Weather (% rain) 90%, possibly thunderstorms
39%, moderate rain, you lose 1 hour, be careful with electricity
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
99 Today i Botwana do anything

Zimbabwe
Weather (% rain) 10%
52, dry
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
22, no issues today

Mozambique
Weather (% rain) 70%
78, dry but very cloudy
Political unrest (% of something happening) 10-20%
62, they just think this whole race is a bit boring as barely anyone passes their country anyway

Angola
Weather (% rain) 20%, more than 30°C
60, dry and hot, stop twice to get extra hydration
Political unrest (% of something happening) 5-10% general Cabinda 20-50%
general 27, safe, Cabinda 66, still somehow safe

Zambia
Weather (% rain) 20%
1, some light rain, you lose 30 mins
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
73 give peace a chance

Malawi
Weather (% rain) 20%
50, dry
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
45 Did you know Lake Malawi was a Eurovision entrant for Czechia?

Madagascar
Weather (% rain) 40%
60, dry
Political unrest (% of something happening) 0-5%
75, youre fine but why in heck's sake are you still here?



Random object generator: Locket, rng:16
24 NIGEL MANSELL is set on a sidequest.




@ Loadsamoney monster truck rng for damage
Chance of hitting something rng: 64%
Rng results: 77, hes' driving like a giraffe on an ice-skating rink, but he manages to go trough without isues.


@Pastamaldonado leave bus rng for getting stuck somewhere
Chance of getting stuck rng 76%
Rng results 67, again, great idea to drive a fricking bus
Rng of time lost: 71, you lose 71 minutes
Rng chance of attracting unwanted attention: 76%
35 You receive a private message from Christian Horner. You get caught driving with a cellphone at the same time, you have to explain to the police officer what just happened. Depending on your explanation, you'll either be fine or not.


Day 4 opens in an hour, people have time to post day 4 until monday 15th april 23:59 GMT+1

April 10th
Another day, another punishing drive ahead. The evening in the morally ambiguous game lodge had had its perks, including a fantastically refreshing bath AND shower as well as dishes whose exact provenance Tom and Yulia had to quickly erase from their memories to preserve some semblance of a clean conscience. A quick check of the transponder locations before bed revealed diverging paths for all involved: the bulk of the pack that had broken straight through Namibia was beginning to struggle hard with the heat of the Namib, the few who wished to shoot for the country-visiting standings had ticked off Lesotho already, and a couple more were headed in a similar direction to our protagonists.

As the designated start time came, the Land Rover departed South Africa for good with a short drive to the border. A 5-minute delay was to be expected, with the aftermath of the previous day's troubles still shaking out. Gaborone, the Botswanan capital, was right across the border.



They wouldn't get to see it. The fastest route towards Norway involved turning right a few kilometres before, through Modipane and straight to the A1 just north of the city. This was the reason the road through Botswana made some kind of weird sense, as the A1 was straight, fast and featured plentiful accommodation in case of emergencies. The road, however, was long and monotonous. Some small settlements along the way made for little entertainment, and they'd quickly resorted to contrived games to pass the time. Yulia had bought some travel card games at the airport on the way out, trivia questions, conversation prompts, things like that. The hope was that an opportunity to get some more novelty would arise before the current one had worn out its welcome.

Mahalapye was the first proper city to arrive, a chance to acquire some diesel for the Land Rover and some Wimpy for the people inside it. The drive continued, and even the small settlements dried up eventually, leaving the road signs as the only external stimuli to keep the duo focused, the numbers announcing the distance to Francistown dwindling little by little. A free stop was made in Mogome for the Hillside Music Lounge, as a local folk group was advertised outside, then again at Palapye where the allure of sharing a Chicken Gatsby at Jimmy's Killer Express (P235) was impossible to ignore.

Again, the signs of life beyond shrubs and short trees began to drift away as the journey progressed. That is, until a very important stop was required to pay tribute to the exquisite, lifelike sculpture of a zebra by the roadside as they finally approached Francistown.



At this point, Francistown had been coming for so long that the hunger had gone, replaced by that of the end point of the trip. A few minutes of traffic in its proper city centre - it had a spaghetti interchange and everything! - contributed to a bit of panic: there wasn't much time left to play with. Making it to the end point would be a close run thing. An hour later, trees became greener and larger. The border to Zimbabwe was thankfully crossed with minimal hassle.

"Country number three!" Tom happily stated. "Eyes on the hotel, Thomas", Yulia responded. Plumtree and Figtree came and went as the tunnel vision narrowed. Curious news trickled in from the map that Yulia was monitoring. "The Finnish girls turned away! They're going north, straight to Zambia apparently?"

It was far too late to react to this news. A fair way ahead on the road, they had to make the strategy work. Almost 9 hours in, the only option now was to go straight through Bulawayo, or at least its outskirts. For all the atrocities committed under their watch, the old Rhodesian regime seemingly had a tough time getting rid of the British influence, with the abandoned race course being named Ascot, and the road to it being named Epsom.



They left Bulawayo with 50 minutes left on the clock. This is where the stress truly kicked in.

No hotels until the next large town, at least none they could vouch for to the organisers. And it was touch and go. Villages dotted the A5. Schools. Farms. Hospitals. Not a single bloody hotel. A restaurant. A flipping airport. Gweru was surely close. The 10-hour limit came. And went. A minute passed. Then two. Then five. Agonising. The tension was close to boiling over when the Farmhouse (turned Airbnb at the equivalent of £52 a night) appeared to their left. Nine minutes were lost in the Francistown and Bulawayo traffic, translating to a 45-minute penalty the next day, but the alternative would have been not to leave Bulawayo at all, a 50-minute loss. Frustrating, but them were the breaks.



Last Word Madikwe (South Africa) to The Farmhouse Gweru (Zimbabwe)

10h04 at the time of checking, plus 5 minutes penalty (27h29 total)
818km (2400km total)
1115 pula (£957 total)

Day 3: Dire Situation



MATEO: So our options in Angola are... limited, to say the least.
ERIS: There are 3 hour stretches of road with NOTHING in them.
AMETH: And we have to deal with the heat.
MATEO: Eh, I deal with worse heat back home.
AMETH: Mateo, it is 32ºC in Angola.
MATEO: And Seville deals with over 45ºC every summer.
ERIS: I-, uh-, wow.
MATEO: Even so; we should still stop for drinks every so often & stock up. The coolbox will be put to good use.
MATEO: I got a route in mind already, so let's go.
AMETH: Don't do anything stupid, okay? If you're tired, just rest.

ROUTE:



Start: The Farmhouse, Otjozondjupa Region, Namibia
End: Pensao Cahama Guest House, Cahama, Angola
Distance: 885km
Time: 9h 33min
Recorded at: 19:07, 13/04/2024

Stop 1: ShopRite, Ondjiva, Angola
Stop 2: Mercado Municipal, Xangongo, Angola

Total distance: 2592km
Total time: 26h 58min (+2h 35min delays)
Countries: South Africa, Namibia, Angola

Locale of the Day: Etosha National Park



ERIS: I've been checking up on our competitors & I have a question.
MATEO: Yeah?
ERIS: Why is it that one of the teams came in full rally race setup?
MATEO: Ha, you mean Team Bert Anzungolst, also known as TBA.
AMETH: ...The founder thought he was sooo clever, huh?
MATEO: This universe has a quirky sense of humor & I'm all for it.
ERIS: What ARE they, exactly?
MATEO: A racing team, mostly known for participating in ARWS.
ERIS: You mentioned that regarding the late night chat, what is the ARWS?
MATEO: The AutoReject World Series, previously the F1 Rejects World Race Series, was a breakaway series from Formula One formed in 2010 & dissolved in 2020. A rival series for the title of the peak of motorsport characterized by a far wackier nature than F1.
ERIS: What rabbit hole did I get into?
AMETH: Actually, where are we sleeping for the night, Mateo?
MATEO: Xangongo, why?
AMETH: There's a place in Cahama where we can sleep & we still fall under the 10 hour mark!
MATEO: Look, I saw that half built place in Cahama, I'm not sure we're even allowed there.
AMETH: No, it's an inn I found on this site called Tracks4Africa, it doesn't show up on Google Maps.
MATEO: Hold up, really? Next time we stop, you can show me.
AMETH: Sure thing!
MATEO: Now, about the ARWS...

At Cahama:
ERIS: Not the fanciest place, but we're in the middle of nowhere, we can't be picky.
MATEO: Nice find, Ameth!
AMETH: No problem!
MATEO: And just down the road is the other place- no way.
ERIS: Wait a minute...
AMETH: I recognize that Ford...
ERIS: The other cars as well...
MATEO: Pro tip: Tracks4Africa is rather helpful.

DAY FOUR:
I wake up in my partially built hotel and I'm hot. Not with temperature, but at being double crossed by my fellow competitor. I'd been drinking with the owner of the Fiesta pickup and somehow he'd managed to turn off my alarm for the morning and skipped on breakfast. He'd also left me to pay the bill for two rooms. I'd hoped the joy of travel might have inspired some sportsmanship, but that's out of the window. At least an hour and a half behind, my original plan of visiting the former New Lisbon of Huambo took a backseat - and I'd have to just stop where I can.

I take the road north, and roll into the city of Lubango where I take my first drink stop of the day. I stop at the Liopa Resturante, which is surpisingly sparse for a Sunday afternoon.


I later stop in Kalukembe, at an Indian Restaurant owned by an Anime fan. Yann Indiano. I gulp down an ice cold mango lassi and power on.

With a minute to spare, I stop for the night in the city of Caála in the imaginatively named Hotel Cáala - an old colonial building on the main drag.
More interestingly, I skip across the road (on foot) to the Estádio Mártires da Canhala - home of 1975 Angolan champions Recreativo de Caála. This is one of the more modern stadiums in Angola, and I managed to watch a U18 game after blagging to the security guard that I'm a scout from Fortuna Dusseldorf.


START: PS SHIYOVA-COMERCIAL, Cahama, Angola

FINISH: Cáala Hotel, 4HX3+HW2, Unnamed Road, Caála, Angola



TIME ELAPSED (TODAY): 8h27m
TIME ELAPSED (TOTAL): 33h39m

DISTANCE (TODAY):577km
DISTANCE (TOTAL): 3092km

COUNTRIES VISITED: 3

Leg 4: 54 km north of Nata, Central District, Botswana -> Outskirts of Monze, Southern Province, Zambia

616 km in 8 h 12 min at 14:09 (UTC+3)

Day 4: The first 250 kilometres of our journey had nothing to write about, except the weather wasn't great so it took us longer than we had been hoping for to cross the Botswanan savannah. We crossed the border at the Kazungula Border Crossing and from the bridge we could also briefly glimpse into Namibia and Zimbabwe, where some of our competitors were driving. After about 300 kilometres of constant driving we reached Livingstone and figured it was time for lunch, so we had some tasty chicken at Hungry Lion and got some groceries from the Spar next door. We then continued heading northeast, and for the next 70 kilometres the only thing of note was a toll plaza in the middle of nowhere. We refuelled the car in Zimba and continued onwards, passing many towns and cities along the way. By the time we reached Monze we had almost used up all of the time we had for the day, and after refilling our grocery situation at the Choppies we started looking for accomodation. While the town itself had plenty of lodges to choose from and even a hotel, we found out that a bit further along the road there was a campsite that also had chalets we could stay in. We reached our destination just in time, so we rewarded ourselves with a nice shower and a proper dinner!

Nessafox wrote: ↑01 Apr 2024, 20:30Rule 14: Keep in mind that whilst this is a contest, please keep it fun and don't overstress yourself

Since I am not having fun with this retarded weather gimmick, I'll disqualify myself for violating that rule.

Edit: since I wasted too much time planning my route before realizing this would be a luck-based shitshow, I'll post my routes out of competition in a desperate attempt to extract some joy from my effort.



Edit 2: and just because girry and nessa can go bathplug themselves with their retarded "skill issue" bullshit, I'll also do it in accordance with the rules just to see where I end up


Time stamp: 2024-04-14-16-22-14

Cape town-Norway Cannoball Run - Day 4

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1nR_jAh ... p=drivesdk


Upon waking up, i wasted no time. I picked up my stuff and drove away towards Benguela in my Supra. You'd think Angola is nothing more than a shithole in the middle of the desert, but actually...well, yeah, it is a shithole, but even shitholes can have interesting history.

As i passed by Xangongo, i saw some of the remnants of conflicts that affected the region. Some kind of civil war and also conflict with a group that became the Namibian Government. There were also some mean people who painted graffiti on a tank.



Surprisingly, though, as i continue down the road, there was green! And animals! Elephants and Giraffes crossed the roads! I looked around and i saw that was driving near the Bicuar National Park, which explained everything.





The heat was still there, though. Oh jesus, the heat! And as i returned to a desertic landscape, it was becoming unbearable, so i had no choice but to stop somewhere in Lubango, the second biggest city in Angola.



It was a nice little city...at least, by the standards of what i saw. What was interesting is that i actually saw a couple of farms with gardens of crops being nurtured by the locals. Reminds me of the farms in Granby back home.

I stopped as the Fresmart Express, a mix between a convenience store and a supermarket, so i could drink some water and buy a couple of veggies.



Off i went up north towards the coast, where my hotel was in Benguela. There was a lot more jungle and forest on the road to Benguela, which was a refreshing change of pace. Along the road i saw plenty of Aardvarks, Elephants, Antelopes and even a tribe of Baboons! The way they looked at my Supra was so funny! I always wondered how the hell those animals were able to withstand such heat.







Before i arrived at Benguela, i stopped at nearby Catengue to fill up the gas tank at a totalenergies gas station, and i took the opportunity torefresh myself with water and a sandwich at a nearby park bench. Thank god i bought Sunscreen back at Lubango. My skin was starting to become red, so i knew i had to pick up the pace.

Thankfully, my Supra had the 2JZ engine, and i hit the floor and managed to reach Benguela. And wow, what a nice city! The views of the beach and the ocean was breathtaking!



I finally arrived at my hotel, a nice place called Hotel Residencial Ramire-Tour. The room was a little bit more expensive at 66$, but it was really nice, and the balcony gave a really good view of the ocean.

Finally, i was halfway there. Next day  is most likely going to Angola's capital, Luanda. For now, though, i'll simply enjoy a sip of water on the balcony of my hotel.



To Be Continued...

Time stamp: 2024-04-14-16-22-14

Ah what a weird night was that! I woke up with a severe headache, 4 coffees later, i felt better. But also too hyperactive! Time for some... morning excercise! After jogging 10 rounds round the hotel - and getting weird looks for it as i was wairing my neon tracksuit - i was ready to get in my car. Well, at least that's what i thought because now i was smelling bad. Back to the shower. I dropped my soap... but thankfully i was alone. Well of we went then! It seems we were only in a small green spot as the landscape got dry again. Still there were the occasional nice animals to spot. After halfway we reached the Limpopo river, which was also the sign we were going to cross in Zimbabwe. This would be our first border pass, but since we were drying a police car, they didnt question us (they probably should, though). The landscape did get greener again. We crossed one of these game ranches again. It did not make me feel comfortable. We were aiming to get in Masvingo and we tried to get as far as we could in the town to get a hotel. We settled on the Palmview Guesthouse which is on the far end of the town. This place looked nice and the food looked delicious. We're glad to be in a hotel with such food options. We were not going to hold back tonight! With the food i mean! The town itself was a bit boring, but it had everyhing we needed



timestamp 19:57
https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Anro+Sa ... &entry=ttu

PREVIOUSLY: PART ZERO () | PART ONE () | PART TWO () | PART THREE ()

Day Four

Peter and Hanse's route today:
https://maps.app.goo.gl/vTS4sEhSbBMYuhyu7