Grand Prix Rejects

FMecha wrote:Inspired by the latest podcast and the movie posters at the Caption This thread, as well as the 'Shortest F1 books' thread. Draw a movie poster for a (fictional) F1-themed film, and explain how the story goes (i.e. the meaning of the poster).

I can't do one for now, sorry.

(And yes, 1000th post! )

Sunshine_Baby_[IT] wrote:The Delatraz's one is the best one!

eurobrun wrote:These are all so funny

Sadly I am too untalented to make my own.

eurobrun wrote:These are all so funny

Sadly I am too untalented to make my own.

CoopsII wrote:

eurobrun wrote:These are all so funny

Sadly I am too untalented to make my own.

Funniest things Ive seen in ages (and that includes Karthikeyan this year). I am also untalented so I will have to sit here in the hope of more appearing!

kostas22 wrote:If inspiration comes to me, I may do some more. Just wait and see.

tzerof1 wrote:Also, nobody should be complaining about a lack of action

kostas22 wrote:

tzerof1 wrote:Also, nobody should be complaining about a lack of action

Except dr-baker of course.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zXDo4dL7SU

Rush director Ron Howard says the biggest challenge of creating his film about the 1976 F1 season was getting the look of the car right. For his new F1 story he had an even bigger challenge, he searched long and hard in the paddock for the most suitable driver to portray the character of Pinocchio.
Speaking to formula1.com and selected media, Howard said casting the characters was a "huge challenge" which "threatened our budget" in the early stages of making the film.
Eventually the film's investors provided funds for them to conduct some exploratory filming at a historic Disney museum. This was a "huge break", according to Howard.
"We were just picking out some story writers and animators that were appropriate to our adaptation," he said. "And we did well, we learned a hell of a lot."
"This movie has been created using a combination of both animation and real life acting. It will be up to the viewer to find the differencies.

"I got the idea for this project after watching my movie Rush at the premiere in L.A. with my now good friend Niki Lauda. Niki mentioned it would be wonderful to see a sequel made, and I jumped at the idea. I wanted to stay within the world of Formula One but also do something completely fresh. "

"More importantly we were able to meet the owners of the original Pinocchio script. When I heard about these people who owned the historic Pinocchio script I thought they were just hobbyists and these were sort of like Disney freaks where they would take the old movie scripts out, start reading them, read the pages a few times and maybe take some pictures.
And they were willing to be a part of our movie once they believed it was going to be approached in an authentic, serious way."
As those who've seen Rush will know, the dedication to authenticity extended as far as getting the race-to-race detail changes to the cars right. For example, Hunt's M23 begins the season with a tall, red airbox which is later swapped for the distinctive L-shaped configuration.
It was just as important to get the Pinocchio film's historical elements correct as some original video has been incorporated into the film.

"People also knew that the wardrobe would have to cut with the wardrobe we were seeing in the archival footage."
"That was useful because it gave everybody a guide but it certainly raised the bar and had to raise everybody's standards."

The accuracy of Adrian Sutil's portrayal of Pinocchio has been hailed by many reviewers. But those behind the film originally wanted someone else to play the role.

"The German investors were a little reluctant about Adrian," said Howard. "They honestly wished we would get an American movie star to play Pinocchio and just do a bad Italian accent."
"But that's not what our scriptwriter wanted nor what I wanted and we knew Adrian's an artist who would take on the daunting task of recreating somebody who's still so well-known, still so iconic."

But while the film makers were quick to settle on Sutil for the role of Pinocchio, it took longer to cast Lewis Hamilton's Lampwick:
"The Lampwick casting threatened to derail the movie," Howard recalled.
"Looking at the list, seeing who's available, thinking about it, there was sort of no one who was fitting the mould as well as Adrian did for Pinocchio. And my heart began to sink, I began to feel like we really shouldn't go ahead with this, it'd be compromised, as excited as I am about the project."

Hamilton had come to prominence for his WDC in 2008. But Howard had doubts over whether the Brit could play a donkey realistically.
"I'd met Lewis and liked him, liked him a lot in McLaren," said Howard, "but no way of knowing whether he could be Lampwick material."
"Ron Dennis said he really had a lot to offer as an actor."
"And one day Lewis just sent in a self-made audition tape. And he took some of the script and just did a few group speeches and it was so cool and such a confidence-builder. He had the body language, the beginnings of the sound, the attitude. He was transforming himself as a good actor does."
That sealed Hamilton's casting in the role. "Then it was done," said Howard. "We knew we had a movie."

Howard was new to the old Disney classics when he began researching Pinocchio. But after a visit to Walt Disney Studios in Burbank, California, he quickly decided it was a compelling subject for a film – "smart, intelligent, thinking person's entertainment."
Howard felt the story of Pinocchio and Lampwick's rivalry gave the movie the right ingredients for an exciting production.

"The combination of a bona fide, big-screen experience that hopefully transports the audience and these rich, fascinating, entertaining characters was, I thought, a great combination and a chance to do something remarkably fresh."
"That's a hard thing to be able to say about a lot of movies that are getting the green light today."
But as with the casting of Sutil there were some who disagreed with the film's direction.

"I did have friends in Los Angeles who read the script and said "who are we rooting for?" Howard admitted. "This is the sort of traditional script note that you get."
But it was an angle the film makers were keen to avoid: "That's one of the unconventional aspects of this. I think people are pleasantly surprised by the move because they expect a more conventional kind of Disney movie to roll out."
"These aren't conventional characters and the good news was it kind of forced myself to take a narrative that doesn't unfold the way you would write it in a movie script and make it work."
"I don't think it's fair to take sides, I don't think there was a good guy or a bad guy there. I felt like it was a rival story and a dual survival story.

"I think the big narrative question was, is whatever was fuelling these guys to go to Pleasure Island in the first place? That's the tension, that's the drama. That's Pinocchio."

good_Ralf wrote::shock: Five-star. Jocke1, you are just dominating the nominations for post of the year now.

UgncreativeUsergname wrote:

good_Ralf wrote::shock: Five-star. Jocke1, you are just dominating the nominations for post of the year now.

I think all of his posts will take points off each other and give the title to a meandering rant published on Christmas by dinizintheoven, who instead of constantly posting funny things, spent the entirety of 2014 working on that one post.

good_Ralf wrote:Marussia is spelt wrong. Plus the credits display the names 'Sandra Bullock' and 'George Clooney'...

Jocke1 wrote:

Formula 1's Mean Girls (2014)
Director: Steven Spielberg
Writers: Rosalind Wiseman (book), Rahel Frey (screenplay)
Stars: Simona de Silvestro, Susie Wolff (formerly Stoddart), Claire Williams
Monisha Kaltenborn, Danica Patrick, Katja Poensgen & Isabelle Tremblay.


Storyline
Susie Wolff is a hit with Formula 1, the A-list girl at Williams, until she makes the mistake of crossing paths with Simona de Silvestro, the young Swiss ace who is an up-and-coming rookie during the 2014 season, who will stop at nothing to succeed.

Raised in Scotland by her dentist parents, Susie thinks she knows about survival of the fittest. But the law of the F1 paddock jungle takes on a whole new meaning when Susie enters the official Friday practice sessions for the first time and encounters psychological warfare and unwritten social rules that women drivers face today.

de Silvestro becomes increasingly jealous of Wolff, in her own pursuit of a race seat at Sauber.
An 'incident' occurs in the pits at Monaco, where de Silvestro tries to sabotage the brakes of Wolff's private car.
Her plan backfires, though, and she breaks both her hands when Susie drops the car on her while she lies under it.

After Simona recovers from her severe hand injuries she plots a scheme to steal Susie's husband, Toto.
But one unexpected thing later occurs on the top of Eau Rouge, which will change their lives forever ...


Plot Keywords: formula one | rivalry | toto | secrets | rascasse
Taglines: Watch your back
Genres: Dark Comedy I Drama

Details
Official Sites: Paramount Pictures. Country: U.S.A I Switzerland I U.K.
Language: English | German | Norwegian
Release Date: 13 August 2014
Also Known As: Susie vs. Simona
Filming Locations: Malmedy, Belgium. Monte Carlo. Harlem N.Y. Abu Dhabi. Barcelona.

Box Office
Budget: US $317 000 000 (estimated)

Company Credits
Production Co: Paramount Pictures, M.G. Films, Broadway Video

Technical Specs
Runtime: 97 min
Sound Mix: Dolby Digital | DTS
Color: Black & White
Aspect Ratio: 1.85 : 1

dinizintheoven wrote:Are there subtitles for those of us who can't understand Susie's haggis-with-muesli accent?

'Goldilocks & The Three Bears' is a survival horror video game for the PlayStation 4 published by Konami and developed by Team Super Nippon!,
a Konami Computer Entertainment Tokyo group.
The first installment in the Shtoom Hill series, a follow-up to the highly popular Silent Hill series, the game is released in North America in June 2014,
and in Japan and Europe later this year. Shtoom Hill uses a third-person view, with real-time 3D environments.
Unlike earlier survival horror games that focused on protagonists with combat training, the player character of Shtoom Hill is a race driver.
Konami has a sequel already planned out for 2015, with a similarly famous yet-to-be-named race car driver.

The game follows Nico Rosberg as he searches for his missing girlfriend in the eponymous fictional Monegasque principality of Shtoom Hill.
Stumbling upon a cult conducting a ritual to revive a deity it worships, he discovers her true origin.
As the game progresses Nico's sanity rapidly diminishes.

The objective of the player is to guide main protagonist and player character Nico Rosberg through a monster-filled town as he searches for his lost
girlfriend, Vivian. Shtoom Hill's gameplay consists of combat, exploration, puzzle-solving and locking up at Mirabeau.

The rights to the game was originally held by CAPCOM, but since the CAPCOM people are previously proven idiots they lost the rights to KONAMI.

At the start of the game, Nico drives to Shtoom Hill with his girlfriend Vivian for a vacation. At the town's edge, he swerves his Mercedes at Mirabeau to avoid
hitting a man in the road; as a result, he crashes the vehicle and loses consciousness. Waking up in town, he meets police officer Susie Wolff, who works in a
nearby town, and realizes that Vivian is missing. Finding that the principality is deserted and foggy, with snow falling out of season, Nico meets several other
people in the monster-filled town: Toto Wolff, who gives him a charm, the "Flauros"; Doctor Niki Lauda, director of Shtoom Hill's Alchemilla Hospital; and nurse
Nicole Scherzinger, who worked at Alchemilla.

He also encounters a symbol throughout the town, which Toto claims will allow darkness to take over the town if it continues to multiply.
Eventually, this darkness begins taking over the town. According to Toto, the man from the road is a demon responsible for the symbol's duplication,
it's name is Lewis Hamilton. He urges Nico to stop the Hamilton demon, because if he does not, Vivian will die.
Nico soon finds himself attacked by Toto, who is parasitized by a creature; the player must choose whether to save him or not.

Nico later awakens in a logicless void known officially only as "nowhere" and encounters Lewis, who realizes he is "the same as them" and begins transforming; Nico flees, horrified.

Nico, hungry and starving looks through a window at a house at the edge of town, peeps through the keyhole, and lifts the latch. Assured that no one is home, he walks in.
Nico proceeds to eat from a bowl of porridge he finds, then settles into a chair and breaks it. Prowling about, he finds a bed and falls asleep.
Suddenly a person wearing a bear suit enters the house and, spotting Nico, he yells out "Somebody has been lying in my bed!!! and there he is!!!"
Nico starts up, jumps from the window, and runs away towards Mirabeau.

Two different endings are available depending on whether Nico saves Vivian or discovers a bottle of Aglaophotis at Niki's apartment, or both.
Aglaophotis is a red liquid which is obtained from the refinement of a plant of the same name, it has the ability to dispel demonic forces and
grant protection against such forces to those who use the item.

The "bad" ending occurs if neither is done; the demon Lewis Hamilton attacks Nico at Mirabeau, who ultimately defeats him.
Nico collapses and the game cuts to his corpse inside the #6 F1 W05 at the Mirabeau run-off area.