Annoying Things Commentators Say

[FullMetalJack]

And "Patrese should be BANNED!"

Forgot about that, he spent pretty much his entire commentating career slagging off either Patrese, Alliot and De Cesaris.

He did repent over slagging off Patrese in his later years though, to be fair. And even over De Cesaris a little I think.
As for Alliot, I think it was entirely justified!

Yup, as evidenced here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xl6w2OHOwkk

[coops]

Yup, as evidenced here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xl6w2OHOwkk

I miss Estoril. There were some great races there. And that armco reminds me of Scalextrix so much I want to go into the loft and get mine out.

[Vassago]

Over here in Poland the lead commentator always describes Brazilian drivers as "nice guys", Barrichello is a nice guy, Massa is a nice guy, Bruno Senna is a nice guy etc. Also when he refers to Ayrton Senna, he always calls him "the legendary Ayrton Senna". The same guy also has a habit of talking about "colorful group of cars on track". I swear to God, I've never heard such a naive comment in my life...

[TimmyB]

You may be surprised to learn that the term 'points paying position' was barely used until James Allen came along.

[ADx_Wales]

Brundle has stopped saying Guesstimate in recent races, there were times when he wouldnt shut up saying the word.

[FullMetalJack]

Brundle has stopped saying Guesstimate in recent races, there were times when he wouldnt shut up saying the word.

I'll admit, that annoyed the hell out of me.

Others on my list on annoying things commentators say, both from Jonathan Legard

"And it's Red Bull from McLaren from McLaren from Ferrari from Red Bull from Williams etc."
"Is it enough, No!"

[FullMetalJack]

Brundle has stopped saying Guesstimate in recent races, there were times when he wouldnt shut up saying the word.

I'll admit, that annoyed the hell out of me.

Others on my list on annoying things commentators say, both from Jonathan Legard

"And it's Red Bull from McLaren from McLaren from Ferrari from Red Bull from Williams etc."
"Is it enough, No!"

[FullMetalJack]

Brundle has stopped saying Guesstimate in recent races, there were times when he wouldnt shut up saying the word.

I'll admit, that annoyed the hell out of me.

Others on my list on annoying things commentators say, both from Jonathan Legard

"And it's Red Bull from McLaren from McLaren from Ferrari from Red Bull from Williams etc."
"Is it enough, No!"

[ADx_Wales]

Up the hill
round the turn
down the hill
sector one
is it quick enough
.....just under
can he do it?
under the bridge
down the hill
feed the ducks
can he make them quack?
yes they have
is it humorous?
yes
it THIS humorous?
no
its crucial

[Frentzen127]

Up the hill
round the turn
down the hill
sector one
is it quick enough
.....just under
can he do it?
under the bridge
down the hill
feed the ducks
can he make them quack?
yes they have
is it humorous?
yes
it THIS humorous?
no
its crucial

That'll do.

[Nessafox]

I gave up watching the Flemish commentary on Belgian Television. Sammy Neyrinck is the king of stating the obvious. So if you know just a bit of F1, you don't learn anything.

"He can't get close enough to driver name so he has to wait until driver name makes a mistake."
"Remeber that drivers must use both tyre compounds."
"And here is Michael Schumacher."

meh they're the most boring commentators EVER
they also made quite a lot of mistakes even my dad noticed (and he doesn't know much about F1 at all) and it was like that every race
when it was still on kanaal 2, the commentator peter baert (and touring car driver philip verellen RIP) was always saying 'what am i saying?' so much that it was becoming annoying but at least they were interested in F1, unlike what we got now.

[Klon]

Well, I show more tolerance for German announcers than most fans, but there is one thing I truly loathe them for:
Von einem deutschen Standpunkt... (from a German point of view)
Who gives two flying bathplugs about Germany? So stop that. Although watching them lose it after Räikkönen crashes into Sutil (Monaco 2008) makes up a bit for it.

[coops]

"It going to be nip and tuck for the lead now"

Isnt that a reference to plastic surgery? Where does that fit in?

[JQW]

And "Patrese should be BANNED!"

And the rag he used to keep inside the cockpit for wiping his visor.

[Debaser]

"It going to be nip and tuck for the lead now"

Isnt that a reference to plastic surgery? Where does that fit in?

If we ever have a race in Los Angeles it would fit in nicely. Otherwise the meaning is lost on me.

[watka]

Particulary during Hakkinens years I would grind my teeth each year as Hungary was described as 'like a home race for the Finnish fans'.

Do you know how far apart these two great nations are? Over 1000 miles. I checked years ago which only added to the teeth grinding.

I think you'll find that it's the closest GP to Finland...

Over here in Poland the lead commentator always describes Brazilian drivers as "nice guys", Barrichello is a nice guy, Massa is a nice guy, Bruno Senna is a nice guy etc. Also when he refers to Ayrton Senna, he always calls him "the legendary Ayrton Senna". The same guy also has a habit of talking about "colorful group of cars on track". I swear to God, I've never heard such a naive comment in my life...

"Nelson Piquet Jr is a nice guy..."

[uh_clem]

How about "front nose"?
American commentators are fond of that one.

[RAK]

Nobody can get the "Sandwich" right at all...
If the Order is Ferrari-McLaren-Ferrari its NOT a Ferrari Sandwich!!! Nor is the McLaren the filling in the Ferrari Sandwich, its a McLaren Sandwich...
Nobody has Bread Sandwiches.

Is this a bacon sandwich, then?

[LukeB]

No it's a heart attack.

[MinardiFan95]

One of the favourite sayings of the Australian commentators is "The action is just heating up here at *insert track here*, so we will go to a commercial break. Don't go away."

[RAK]

"Making hay" - a derivative of "Making hay while the sun shines", and a favourite of Legard. It would be annoying regardless of the commentator, though.

[razta]

Ledgard is just like some dull weatherman.. honest he makes James Allen sound much better

Talking about the "Sandwich" comment.. the best one of Brundle's "oneliners" was silverstone 2003 when schumi was between the two BARs
"Is that a Ferrari Sandwich, or a BAR Snack?"

[bighaydo]

One of the favourite sayings of the Australian commentators is "The action is just heating up here at *insert track here*, so we will go to a commercial break. Don't go away."

They are outstanding like that...

My other favourite is "Don't go away, the pitstops for the leaders will be happening within the next couple of laps" [insert commercial break full of the same ads we saw last time and at least three for the network] "While we were on the break we saw the pitstops for drivers x,y,z - here's a replay..."

(Osella) FA1L ! ! !

[coops]

Interlagos is not, I repeat, is not Rubens Barrichellos 'backyard'.

[MaxZero]

Legard's continual rhetorical questions, particularly during Q3, absolutely infuriating

also;

Brundle: "This is where Massa had his terrible accident, you can still see the skid-marks"

I dunno if that was deliberate but it made it into Private Eye's Colmanballs

[ADx_Wales]

Not an annoying thing, but Murray used to pronounce words in a way that no other person would...

And nigel mansell is faasturrh than patrese who was faas-tesst in provisional practice...

And try as he may...

[Aerond]

From a former Spanish commentator, in the early days of Alonsomania: "Come on, Fernando, put the bait in the fishing rod, today we go fishing!" (more or less )

T

Phoenix, un día de estos tenemos que hablar tú y yo por privado.

Yo me uno a la charla... joder con Jesús Fraile...

[Aerond]

So would some Spaniards claim Nurburgring (I think) 1997 as the historic moment that a Spaniard first won a Grand Prix?

Also the podium gaffe is genuinely incompetent. Has the standard improved now that F1 has a rather higher profile in Spain?

San Marino actually (I think). But no, no one would ever claim such a thing. That was in the pre-2003 days, when Spanish drivers where never at the front. It was actually nice that he would comment on Frentzen's half-Spanish roots; the problem was that he kept repeating it all the time. Most people in Spain don't even know who Frentzen is, given that he retired back in 2003 and very few people bothered watching before Alonso.

And yes, the standards have improved, because they just couldn't get worse. We didn't get national coverage until 1999, and TVE always delayed the issue of buying the rights until it was too late. In 2000 we didn't get to see the first 4 races. In 2002 we didn't had coverage (TV3, the Catalonian broadcaster, has been doing F1 since the mid-90s, but that only covers Catalonia, Valencia and the Balearic Islands). In 2003 TVE still refused to buy the rights, in spite of Alonso getting a Renault drive: we missed the Australian GP and reportedly it was Renault itself that payed for it to be broadcasted (in exchange for a bit of free publicity; they also got a nice return because of Alonso's good performances on track).

Usual features of TVE's F1 coverage were: beginning the broadcast really late, usually when the cars were about to start the formation lap; not showing qualifying at all, or showing it delayed; and finishing the broadcast as soon as the cars crossed the final line. In their final season (2003) they always (save the Australian GP of course) showed qualifying, and usually waited for the podium (never the press conference), but they still began the races very late, 10 minutes before the start at most.

In 2004 everything changed, Tele5 bought again the rights and they started doing a proper coverage of the sport, with a nice preview for every race and so on, and it has remained more or less the same at La Sexta. Commentary has also improved, partially because now they can rely on former drivers like Gené or De la Rosa. Gené is not a great commentator, but he uses to be very informative (and he has Ferrari insight, so this season he's very handy as the commentary is logically centered on Alonso), while De la Rosa is the other way around, but they are both good. This year they had Andy Soucek for a couple of races (as Gené was doing other things, like Le Mans, and of course De la Rosa was racing) and the guy is GREAT, better than both Gené and DLR. He really surprised me: for the first time, there was a guy in the TV that understood what was going on BEFORE I did

Lobato is a very partisan commentator, but at least you can see that he does a very serious job and is actually passionate about the sport (or does a great job at looking like it). He's of the "James Allen" kind of commentator, only that Allen has been doing F1 for 20 years and is a lot more experienced and knowleadgeable. Lobato can really exasperate you at times, but you can't negate the guy's passion; that's what most people say about Allen as well.

It´s not like that exactly. TVE used to broadcast the F1 in the late 80s, early 90s, but I was a child at that time and can´t remember how often they did it. Telecinco bought the rights for 1994; and it was weird, as sometimes they showed the races live (at the start of the season, mainly), but from Montreal onwards they showed it at 3am Monday morning ... Bernie warned them and for 1995 they showed the whole championship live, but for 1996 they returned to their original antics and FOM didn´t want to deal with them ever again, so Spain was left without coverage for 1997 and 1998. Telecinco first era boradcasts were pretty bad. I remember presenting the top 4 drivers like this (every race). For example, if a 1995 race started in this order; Schumacher, Hill, Alesi, Hakkinen, they would say:

"At the first row you´ll see a light blue car, that´s the Michael Schumacher Benetton, behind is Damon Hill, with the Williams. The red car behind is Jean Alesi, in the Ferrari and just behind him in the red and white car of Mika Hakkinen"

And, always, always like that. Every race.

[ADx_Wales]

"A Real Driver's Circuit...."
Like its "A Real Footballer's Pitch"?
"A Real Boxer's......ring"?

Hungaroring is "like monaco without barriers"
LETS PUT THE BARRIERS IN, THAT'LL MAKE THE TRACK INTERESTING!!

The "Daunting Turn 8"
Yes, theres gun turrets on the outside if you stray off the racing line, theres also an acid bath for those who get it completely wrong , its THAT daunting.

[coops]

I generally enjoy what Eddie Jordan has to say but his "look im friends with everyone in the paddock" is beginning to grate. Has any team principal/driver/engineer/mechanic/sponsor not been man handled and back slapped by EJ in the last 18 months?

[Phoenix]

From a former Spanish commentator, in the early days of Alonsomania: "Come on, Fernando, put the bait in the fishing rod, today we go fishing!" (more or less )

T

Phoenix, un día de estos tenemos que hablar tú y yo por privado.

Yo me uno a la charla... joder con Jesús Fraile...

yo aún sigo esperando a que Ferrim me responda, pero dejemos en paz a Jesús Fraile...

[J Washburn Stoker]

Straightaway.

[JJMonty]

Legard..... so unimaginitive...... and his infamous quotes..... generally repeating something 5 times....

And if there is ever an incident.. his words are "OH AND THERE'S A PROBLEM THERE FOR [insert driver name here]"

The one that really got on my tit was when Vettel sideswiped Button in Belgium...... "OH AND THERE'S A PROBLEM FOR VETTEL!" while im thinking (yeah, he's just crashed!)

Compare that unimaginitive quote to a Murryisum..... he would say something like "and OH! OH! OFF GOES VETTEL! AAAAND INTO BUTTON!"

[Ferrim]

Phoenix, un día de estos tenemos que hablar tú y yo por privado.

Yo me uno a la charla... joder con Jesús Fraile...

yo aún sigo esperando a que Ferrim me responda, pero dejemos en paz a Jesús Fraile...

¡Joder! No tenía ni idea de que Aerond fuera español también. Ahora te contesto

[coops]

Has anybody else noticed how often Legard will ask Brundle a question only for Brundle to disregard it and talk about something else?

[Ferrim]

It´s not like that exactly. TVE used to broadcast the F1 in the late 80s, early 90s, but I was a child at that time and can´t remember how often they did it. Telecinco bought the rights for 1994; and it was weird, as sometimes they showed the races live (at the start of the season, mainly), but from Montreal onwards they showed it at 3am Monday morning ... Bernie warned them and for 1995 they showed the whole championship live, but for 1996 they returned to their original antics and FOM didn´t want to deal with them ever again, so Spain was left without coverage for 1997 and 1998. Telecinco first era boradcasts were pretty bad. I remember presenting the top 4 drivers like this (every race). For example, if a 1995 race started in this order; Schumacher, Hill, Alesi, Hakkinen, they would say:

"At the first row you´ll see a light blue car, that´s the Michael Schumacher Benetton, behind is Damon Hill, with the Williams. The red car behind is Jean Alesi, in the Ferrari and just behind him in the red and white car of Mika Hakkinen"

And, always, always like that. Every race.

I knew about pre-1999 coverage, but I thought it would be too long, and I didn't watch before 1999 so I couldn't speak from my own

[Jordan192]

Legard crossed two lines for me today - He usually at least makes some effort to at least seem in some way impartial, but today eveything was framed in terms of Button and Hamilton to truly James Allen-esque levels. However, for me the real low-watermark was:

"Where they have the enthusiasm but not the knowedge yet"
"Some of this crowd probably still think Schumacher is driving for Ferrari"

You patronising bathplugger. I can cope with the banality of your normal "up the hill, down the hill, he knows the time to beat" rubbish, but this... I actually found genuinely offensive. This race got a good crowd, more than China or Turkey will probably ever see, so to be so condescending was horrendous. Bathplug off back to football, John, I'll tolerate you no more.

[midgrid]

To be fair, in the intro to qualifying we had Jake Humphrey wandering around the local town with photos of the championship contenders, asking people who they theought would win, and one man kept shouting "Schumacher!" even though he wasn't one of the choices. That's probably where Legard got it from.

[Jordan192]

To be fair, in the intro to qualifying we had Jake Humphrey wandering around the local town with photos of the championship contenders, asking people who they theought would win, and one man kept shouting "Schumacher!" even though he wasn't one of the choices. That's probably where Legard got it from.

Yeah, but i think it's probably safe to assume that guy wasn't going to be attending. I'm pretty sure you could produce an extremely similar piece in any town in the UK.

[Aerospeed]

"The race has been red flagged"

GAAAHHH!!!